Do Not Judge!

One day I was in the library reading for school and noticed a middle-aged woman come in with several bags. She spotted a table with two chairs and began to put her bags in them to claim her spot. She began to unpack her bags full of paper and neatly organize them on the table. What caught my eye was that she walked away and brought two more chairs to the table and placed them in their proper position. So, I automatically assumed that she was expecting others at the table. But, no one ever came to sit with her. Her hair was all over her head and her clothes were wrinkled. I tried to get back to my reading, but was completely distracted by her constant moving about the table. She made frequent trips to the bookshelves and returned and stacked books on the table. I immediately thought, “This lady is suffering from some type of mental illness.” She literally could not stay seated. She was overwhelmed by all of her bags and seem to have a problem focusing on one task. Many people came and asked if she was using her chairs and she turned them away. After one hour, I realized that I was not going to get any work done and decided to leave.
Two weeks ago, I went to the Baptist Theological Seminary in my area to read for school. I carried my laptop bag, another bag with my books, and paper, and my purse. I spotted a table and began unpacking my things. I sat down and pulled up some information on the computer and got hungry. I got up and got some snacks from the cafe and sat down to eat them. My cell phone rang and I answered a call very quietly. Then I had to go to the bathroom. When I returned, I realized that my table was not very organized, so I straightened it. I sat down and began to read. Then I realized that I had not answered an email, so I checked my email. Then I checked Facebook. The snacks I ate before did not satisfy me, so I got up again and went back to the cafe to get a sandwich. When I came back to the table and sat down, I noticed a few people looking at me. Then I saw the image of the middle-aged woman in the library in my head and began to laugh very quietly. By this point, I realized how much I looked like a crazy woman to the people around me. That is when this scripture came to mind. Mark 7:1-2 says that we should not judge others or we will be judged by the very same thing. I had to repent for judging the woman and from that point on, I sat quietly and read my text until I was ready to go home.
The lady in the library could have very well been mentally ill, or she could have been just like me. What was wrong with me? Well, I just was not ready to do the work. I was finding every excuse to do something else, which was not going to help me in the long run. So, I say this to my friends, family, and blog subscribers, “Things are not always what they appear to be. Rather than looking at the outside and passing judgments on people, pray for them instead.”

The Favor of God

I never want to miss an opportunity to give God the glory, even in the little things. I encourage you to do the same. This year I declared favor over my life and family, in the name of Jesus. He has not ceased to amaze me, yet. Many of you already know that I rented a compact vehicle last Sunday to replace my totaled vehicle. I received a luxury minivan for the same price, which was a $300 difference. Hallelujah!

On last Friday, I had a birthday party with a 15-person minimum. On the Thursday before, I had a count of seven people. By noon on that day, I had a count of 14. Twenty-three people showed up at the party and we had a fabulous time! Glory to God. I did not know that I had that many friends. (smile) The Lord knows what we need even before we ask of him.

Finally, my husband purchased me a laptop computer for my birthday. We got a great deal on a 64-bit refurbished machine with lots of memory and hard drive disk space for a fraction of the price. When I went to pick up the computer, the box had been opened. I expressed my dissatisfaction with the presentation of my purchase, after we had made such a large investment, at least for our budget. As a result, I received Geek Squad protection for a year for all three of our computers at $100 off and it included Antivirus software protection for them as well. I give God the glory!

It is only January 15 and He has done so much for my family and me. There are great things in store for us in 2012. I decree the same things for you as well, in Jesus name! Amen!

Be Prepared

A few days ago, my husband and I were out looking for another vehicle.  I have been stuck at home the past few weeks because a drunk driver wrecked my  mini van.  I have lost income as a result, but I was able to get some school work done and work on other things pertaining to Heart to Heart Coaching.  We strongly believe that we should not incur debt to purchase a vehicle and will only purchase what we can pay cash for.  So, we went to a dealer that had access to many different makes and models of vehicles and he asked me what I was looking for.  I stood there like a deer in head lights.  I heard crickets chirping.  I honestly could not put my finger on what I wanted.  He asked me again and then said, “I cannot help you get what you want until you tell me what you need.”    Lesson learned: Know yourself!  Know what you need!  Know what you want! Know what you can afford!  When that person who is assigned to be a blessing to your life pops the question, be ready to answer without a doubt. Have I come to know what I want yet?  Not really.  I need something that seats seven people.  I want a hybrid SUV.  I can afford something used for now.  I came up with this!

Is this what I am getting?  Not right now.  I am waiting on my angel investor to come and put the cash in our pockets so we can walk right off the lot with it.  Until then, I am searching for another luxury mini van or SUV that has good gas mileage and is safe for my family. This may be more practical. 

I remember someone telling me a story about how a man was overburdened with debt and was on the edge of foreclosure and bankruptcy.  After crunching the numbers daily trying to find ways to make the ends meet, he went to the Lord in prayer and asked for relief.  Not many days after, he was approached by a stranger in a bank.  The stranger asked him, how much money do you need to pay off your debtors?  He then remembered the countless hours of trying to work the numbers and was able to tell a complete stranger the exact amount of money needed to eradicate his debt.  The stranger walked over to a banker and talked in private while the gentleman waited in line patiently for his turn.  Minutes later, he returned and handed him an envelope and told him to have a blessed day.  The man opened the envelope and a check was enclosed with enough money to pay off his debt and some left over to give him cushion.

I wonder what would have happened if he did not know how much debt he owed.  I wonder what would have happened if he had not prayed to the Lord for help.  Again, the bottom line is that we have to get in position for what it is that God wants to bless us with.  Be prepared to give an answer for everything.  Shalom!

A Look at 2011

I am sitting here at my computer feeling so many emotions right now. Two thousand eleven has been a year of great gain and loss at the same time for me. I am encouraging myself in the Lord.

I turned 41 years in January and was not thinking about myself at all. I spent the day at the hospital praying with a dear friend who was battling cancer. My mother came to New Orleans shortly after to help me out and little did she know that she would move here to help us out with the children. At the month end, I gave birth to a bouncing baby girl named Judah, which means praise. This was in spite of the difficult pregnancy that I had and explains my determination to call those things which did not exist into existence. She is a lively child, just like her brother. She is the apple of her father’s eye, both naturally and spiritually.

No too long after, in the month of February, my oldest son decided that his time was up with our family structure and he flew the coop. One of the most difficult things that a mother has to do is to release her son, but I did it. I had to trust God with him because I knew what I put on the inside of him was not going to return void. If he departed from it, I knew he was going to come back to it. My God has never failed me. I learned to focus on the things that I cannot see and not look at what is visible before my eyes. Guess what? He’s alright!

Having three babies took a toll on my abdominal muscles and I had to have surgery to repair a really bad hernia and muscle tear. Recovery time took about two months, but now I am standing tall. In mid year, I accepted an appointment as an independent agent for Aflac after receiving my license to sell health and accident insurance. Is it anything like the perks of selling pharmaceuticals and driving new cars? No. Have I won sales contests and received tv’s, Bose stereo’s, camera’s, iPod’s, etc. No. Am I a slave to the establishment. No. So I guess I cannot complain. The difference is, if I don’t work, I don’t eat. The bottom line is plain and simple. This is not the purpose that God has for me, but it is in the plan B.

The day my husband left for Nigeria for six weeks was difficult. I felt like a piece of myself was being pulled away, but I knew he needed to go back home to see his family. On the way to the airport, we got word that a dear friend of ours lost his battle to lung cancer. Akin had a sweet spirit, was a faithful member of the body of Christ, and was an entrepreneur after my own heart. We miss him. One week before my husband returned, I received news that my dear friend Dionne lost her battle to lung cancer and it crushed me. I began to wonder why the Lord did not reveal to me that he was going to take her. My faith was so high that she was going to beat the cancer, publish that bestseller that she had decreed, and accomplish many of her other dreams. I was devastated and felt insecure in my prayer life, but I exalted the Lord and gave him the praise and worship that He required and desired of me. Dionne was a client, but she inspired me. She made my logo for my business, which I will probably keep forever in her memory. She was such a spirit-filled and lively woman. We miss her.

I had an opportunity to see some miracles, signs, and wonders. The Lord blessed us with a bigger home and faith to run it. Things don’t add up in the natural, but I tell you, the math looks good in the spiritual. Then, a drunk driver hit my van, that I was loading, and totaled it. I could have been smashed between it and a truck, but God! What the enemy meant for evil, the Lord meant for good because we got the pay off within three days. I see increase! Two days before, I told the Lord that I needed something better to drive. Two weeks before, I had two dreams that someone was trying to take my life. I prayed against it and release it to the Lord. Thank you Jesus for the blood!

Finally, my oldest son is 18 years old today. I thought I was sliding into a mid-life crisis, but I rebuke that in the name of Jesus. There is a season for everything. While in my personal winter season, the ground may be frozen over, but my harvest is coming. The seeds that we have sown to the nations have matured and it is harvest time. The Lord promised us that we would bear fruit in season and out of season. We are planted by rivers of living water and our roots extend deep into the spirit realm. The seed did not look like what it’s future dictated, but it has matured. Likewise, we may not look like what the Lord has promised he will do with us, but we will step into the place that He has destined for us to be. We are excited about what 2012 will bring. Pray with us!

Financial Wisdom

I am a firm believer that you cannot take someone where you have not been. Sometimes, the very word that you speak from your mouth is the same word that you are tried by. So, in the mist of financial struggles two years ago, a word of wisdom came to me that I would like to share with my readers. I trust that you will be blessed by them as well.

1. Live on less than you earn.
2. Give tithes and offerings to your place of worship first.
3. Pay yourself something next. Put at least 10% into a retirement account. You can’t do this is you are living on more than you earn.
4. Save for a rainy day. Trust me, there will be rainy days. Your vehicle will need repairs. Some appliance is bound to fail when you least expect it. In this economy, lay offs are a normal thing. A good formula to stand by is having a least 3-6 months of living expenses in an emergency fund. Replenish it as you pull from it.
5. Get yearly physical exams to stay on top of your health.
6. Pay cash for everything! This includes your vehicles. Credit card companies are making a killing off of our need to have something right now. We end up paying a whole lot more for it. If you have to use the cards, pay them in full each month before the interest accrues.
7. If you are swallowed in debt, try downsizing your lifestyle until you are debt-free.
8. Put clothes that you don’t wear in consignment. Shop for new clothes in consignment stores or discount stores. Give things to the poor.
9. Instead of buying a new wardrobe when it gets drab, try buying new accesories to go with what you already have, such as a scarf, a belt, a new blouse, earrings, or a hat.
I hope you all found these helpful. I pray financial peace in your households.

Given

I was talking on the phone to a really good friend of mine. As always, she encouraged me in my walk with the Lord and the work that He has called me to do. We were talking about all of the trials that my husband and I have been through since 2007. We have not had a break yet, but we are still trusting God that our Jordan is very near. She reminded me of the scriptures where Jesus was with the disciples and they were having the last supper. He blessed them. He broke the bread. And, He gave. That is what she said He was doing for us. He already blessed us when He went to the cross. I thank God He chose us. He broke us by allowing us to go through what we are going through to prepare us for the work we are called to do. And, He gave us to the cause. I am married to the work that He has called for me to do in ministry. I don’t need financial compensation from it to feel successful. I would do it for free if it meant changing a life for the better. I have been challenged by the need for finances to get to the women who need my services the most, but somehow He makes it happen. So, I say to the Lord, “Here I am. Give me away to those who need me. Use me for Your glory. And I will give You all the glory, in Jesus Name, Amen.”

My Vision

God is faithful, awesome, wonderful, magnificent, and everything else that is better than good. He has brought me through and through and has always been right there with me. I thank Him over and over again. A couple of weeks ago, I went to the hospital for a minor surgical procedure that went very well. I had no complications and the surgeon accomplished what we needed her to do. I am well! Much of that day is a blur to me, as was my vision right after I regained consciousness. Everything was blurry and I did not think anything of it, except that the anesthesia just needed more time to wear off. The next day, I was up and about, but my vision was still blurry. I wear a weak prescription lens for reading, but I had recently lost them. I could not see anything on the computer screen, nor could I see clearly in the distance. It so happened that I spent time with a sister friend who is an opthomologist and she suggested that I come and see her the following Monday. My pastor prayed for me at church on Sunday and by the following Monday, my distance vision had been restored. Today, almost two weeks later, my reading vision is better than it was before.
I say this to say, vision is important. We take it for granted. When it is compromised we see how it can hinder the progress that we intend to make on a day-to-day basis. It is more difficult to navigate through our world not being able to see clearly. The same is true with our spiritual vision. The bible tell us that “without a vision, the people perish.” When we have no direction in life, we are subject to wander aimlessly and have to endure bumping into obstacles that are along the way. When we have the vision that God has ordained for our lives hidden in our hearts and written on paper, He will illuminate the path that we need to take in order to secure the dream seed on the inside. When we have this secret in our hearts, the enemy will come to steal it and try to blind us from our purpose. I say, get in position, and take it back, by force. When we have no vision, we cannot see where we are going. Get the vision, write it down, and run with it!

Transitions

Life is filled with journeys. When one ends, another begins. Different lessons are learned along the path. Sometimes a journey has to be repeated until the lesson is learned. I have been through a lot these past five years. In 2005, I went on my first mission trip to Nigeria where I met my husband. We married in early 2006, but had to wait a year and a half before he was able to join me in the United States. In late 2007, we lost a baby, which was harder on me than I thought it would be. Shortly after, we conceived again, but was told to terminate our pregnancy at 20 weeks, because of a malformation of the cerebellum in our little boy’s brain. We stood on the word of God and decided against it. His brain was normal 4 weeks later, which the doctors told us would never happen. We delivered a perfectly healthy baby boy later that year. During this time, I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis and had to go on short term disability. I had difficulty walking and holding things. When the disability ran out, so did my job and medical and dental benefits in 2009. During this time, the Lord showed himself as Jehovah raphe. Yes! He healed my body and I was able to function without the medications that were prescribed. I received my certification as a Christian Life Coach during this time of waiting. Later in 2009, we sold our home and relocated to New Orleans. I began a graduate program at Walden University online in Mental Health Counseling in 2010. Before I knew it, we were pregnant again and my studies became a challenge. On top of all of the pregnancy sickness, my teenage son began to have some challenges which really put my faith in God to test. It tested my marriage, parenting, and family structure. We continued to pray and trust God.

Our new baby girl was born at the end of January 2011. She is the first girl in the Ojeabulu family and our last baby. My teenage son’s issues came to a head and drastic measures were put in place. According to the state of Louisiana, he is an adult at 17 years of age. So, he packed his clothes and moved in with a friend. I truly thought that I would not be able to bear what had happened to my first born child, but soon realized that I must turn the situation over to the Lord. I remembered that what I put in him from birth, he will come back to it.

I say all this to say that we must have the right mind during all of life’s transitions. The Lord showed me that He did not allow me to be consumed by all of my trials. I am still standing! Maya Angelou said that when you learn, teach. So, I now see that my mess is my ministry and I will be able to help others handle their life transitions. I never would have been able to do it without my Lord! Be encouraged.

Procrastination is Evil!!

I am convinced that procrastination is pure evil. Why? Because the enemy knows the activities that we need to get done in order to inch our way closer to the destiny that God has for us. He will pull out every stop in order to distract us and take our eyes off the vision. Procrastination could also be due to the fact that we are lazy and are in need of motivation. But, that is evil too. Lazy people have a tendency to be impoverished. Procrastination can be a result of poor planning and organization. Important things receive less priority for not-so important things. Procrastination could also be a result of self-sabotaging behavior, fear of success, fear of failure, or just a spirit of fear in general. So what do we do when we suffer with this problem?

Procrastination has to be handled in the spiritual realm first. You must take authority over it with the word of God and curse it at the root. 2 Timothy 1:7 says that “…God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” We need to confess this over our lives with our mouth, especially when we are faced head on with the urge to put off what we should do right away. I would encourage everyone to search the scriptures for topics on fear and apply the word of God to their prayer lives.

There are some books that we can read that will help us deal with this issue as well. Brian Tracy’s “Eat that Frog” is an excellent resource for helping people to do the most difficult thing one bite at a time. Soliciting your life coach for help in this area will help bring accountability, but he/she won’t be at home or work with you when the rubber meets the road. Essentially, it is up to each of us to make a decision that we want God’s best for our lives. I pray that the Lord will strengthen each of you and move you to higher heights in Him. Amen!

What is the Best Way I Can Reach You?

I often ask this question of my clients. There is nothing more disappointing than to call someone and leave a voice message, but get no return call. The same applies for email, text messaging, or snail mail. Frankly, I think that some etiquette training around the topic would be in order. Much of the time, I think it is due to poor organization and time management. But, that is a different story.

There is no harm in asking this question of people, especially if you are doing business together or have to touch base often. For me, I don’t particularly care for voice messaging. I have a mobile and an office line and I find it to be a little tedious to have to check both. I also don’t like having to write down detailed information if the message is long. I prefer for people to contact me by text if they don’t reach me by phone. If someone is calling from a land line and don’t reach me, I ask for an email message, because I can retrieve it from my mobile phone if I am away from the computer. There are times when this is not possible because some people are not that savvy with technology. I understand completely. But, let the record show that they have been served notice about how to best reach me and get a quick response. People appreciate it when you have respect for their time and promptly respond to them when they call. So, what is the best way for you to be contacted?